Wednesday 13 July 2011

The Rebekah Brooks Diary Part 2

Had a couple of days at home - James calls them "mental health days" and I jolly well needed them. Gave a speech to the oiks at the NOTW (gone and damn well should be forgotten) and they were most rude. It was bad enough in a room with so many of that sort of person (something called Lynx, apparently) but there was no cause for the sort of rudeness I experienced. Perhaps they'll now realise that if they behave badly they must suffer the consequences.

Been catching up on my reading: finally got round to Lord Of The Rings. Had to correct Charlie several times over his "Oh, Lord Mauron" remarks. Thank god Etonians have rich parents is all I'll say, the man's on the intellectual level of all those jockeys' wives he used to know.

It's been quite odd watching telly - lots of people one knows. Well, one knows everybody, of course, but they're not usually quite so public. Andy Coulson, a man who used to work for me, if I recall correctly, has lost another job - three in such a short period does seem to show there's something wrong there - glad I got rid of him. Good judgement and a firm hand, that's what an editor needs.

Oooh, time to stop writing for a bit: Top Gear's coming on. So glad I was able to help dear Jeremy along a bit, even if Rupie didn't like a BBC programme getting good press. I believe Jeremy's been giving George some advice on lightening up - increase his oik appeal. Worked well on that odious little Bryant - oh yes it did.

Right dear diary, I'm back. Loved TG as usual, though I must say that Hammond chap reminds me of Nick Clegg for some reason. Suppose that would make the big one Kenneth Clarke, all floppy and bad ideas! Too fond of American cars in my opinion.

Dave's on the box now, looking a wee bit frazzled, as they say in Warrington. Haven't seen him this irritable since he and Sam proved so useless at Charades last Christmas. Odd, I suppose, him being a pol but then if he'd been cleverer he'd have gone into the City. Sam says he "accidentally" kicks over the Monopoly board if he's losing.

Haven't heard from Rupie for a couple of days. I imagine he's busy with the Sun Rehash project. James says he might be talking to a select committee soon - show some of those awful plods how it's done. Really, if that's what we're making Assistant Commissioner these days, no wonder so many Poles and whatever are climbing onto lorries in Calais. Makes you realise that the dinner table is no place for a job interview!

Well, time to stop rambling. Charlie's just come up and done the horse's head joke again. Gave him a very frosty look and he muttered about "no chance of head round here" and went off to moisturise. He can be very Bullingdon sometimes.

Rebekah Brooks Diary:
   Part 1
   Part 2
   Part 3
   Part 4
   Part 5


Tony Lee said...

I enjoyed this!

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