Monday 3 December 2018

Theresa May's Brexit plan: No but yeah but

When Theresa May met Vicky Pollard ...

Mrs May, it’s been weeks now and we still haven’t seen your Brexit plan.

No but because what happened was was I was going round Liam’s but then this whole fing happened right because Amber Rudd who’s a bitch anyway has been completely going around saying that Justine stole some money out of Esther’s purse but I ain’t never not even some to Justine ‘cause she spat in Edwina’s hair.

Mrs May, when will we see the Brexit plan?

Yeah because but what happened was was this whole fing happened what I don’t even know anyfin about because Boris Johnson has been going around saying that David’s brother smells of mud but I ain’t so shab never even not even stole no car so shab.

Mrs May, have you even started this plan?

No but yeah but yeah but yeah no but yeah no but yeah but no because I’m not even going to Europe because Liam reckons they smell of garlic.

You know if we don’t get the plan by the end of this Parliament you do know it will be a disaster for the UK?

Yeah I know but David Davies emptied a whole bottle of Fanta into Merkel’s bag but anyway Boris reckons he fingered her in the Commons.

Mrs May, do you want the UK to prosper?

UK what? Don’t give me evos.


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