"Get back home woman and start hustling."

For those who doubted that Liz Truss would have the unmitigated gall to consider another stab at this government lark, you were wrong, as a wonderfully Trussian apologia in the Sunday Telegraph shows.

Liz says, to paraphrase, that she was told to "Get back home woman and start hustling" when the fatberg Boris Johnson finally clogged the sewer of public greed. Who told her that is a matter for another day but she did get back Jojo, built a bus, won the leadership and launched the most daring, most innovative economic policies the world had ever seen.

Sadly for Ms Truss, those pesky left-wing kids were waiting to pounce. The commie IMF and all the rest, putting the Maoist bovver boot into the danglers of derring do. And so she was defenestrated, despite her 49 days of brilliance. Shine on, you crazy diamnod wearer. But now, she smells Sunak's blood in the water and she begins the comeback with, well, self-serving guff. Read on, feel the trembling. They couldn't. Could they?

Liz Truss has offered sound economics, but terrible communication, says David Frost

In which Lord Frost builds a strawman, rogers it soundly and then buys the deluxe model, the one with real hair, and gives it a good seeing-to.

Frostworld is a horrible place but I read the article and so must you. Ho ho. Text below.

The Ukraine crisis has humiliated the EU says Camilla Tominey

"Bitter Remainers refuse to accept it, but Brexit Britain deserves credit for standing up to Russia"

Yes, folks, Camilla has dusted off her strawmen and ridden into battle against the European furrins and the remoaners who sully our sceptred rouble land.

The usual risble bile but here's the article anyway (as a service to the 99.9% of the population who won't subscribe to the Telegraph).

Lord Frost is absolutely right to be getting tough with the bullying EU, says IDS

Some good stuff from Iain Duncan Smith in the Telegraph (really). A couple of facts, some exaggeration, some lies of omission and a massive strawman or two - mixed so skilfully that one doubts it was serial liar and thicko IDS who wrote it.

He essentially says that Lord Frost can't trust vengeful Europeans and should kick them in the goolies at the start of every negotiating session. One wonders why David Frost, Chief Negotiator for Exiting the European Union from July 2019 to January 2020, Chief Negotiator of Task Force Europe since January 2020, didn't try this.

There's also a good pop at Olly Robbins, sneeringly referred to as "Sir Oliver" by Sr Iain. As Olly quickly found a lucrative post at Goldman Sachs after orally copulating EU negotiators (I paraphrase), I have little sympathy for him.

For those who feel like a splutter, read on for the full text of the Duncan Smith drivel.

A trade deal with India is the great Brexit prize that could determine the West’s fate: Dan Hannan

"The UK-India relationship is special - not only economically and geopolitically, but also sentimentally," says Dan Hannan in his latest comedy column for the Telegraph.

He goes on to call Liz Truss "the unstoppable Yorkshirewoman" so you can tell he was shroomed to the eyballs when penning his latest drivel.

For those who can't get past the DT paywal, here's the full article. Read and weep.</p?

No-deal unleashes a raft of economic opportunities, Tom Harwood

More Telegraph guff, this time from Tom Harwood. He excoriates Ireland for its low tax rate for the Amazons of this world then says the UK can attract such businesses by, er, cutting our corporate tax rate to below Ireland's. The rest is Vote Leave bulls**t and ignorant tosh.

Read on for the full text of Harwood's strange little article.

Ben Wallace on Michael Gove

July 2016 and Ben "Loose Lips" Wallace gives us his thoughts on Michael Gove, rather amusingly.

Ben, a fighting man who didn't get many medals, was and is a Boris groupie and still quivers with righteous anger when Gove's name (or that of his good lady wife) is mentioned. Read on for the Telegraph article Wallace produced all those many years ago.

The French are right to be worried, warned Liz Truss in 2015

A Telegraph interview from 2015, in which then Environment Sec Liz Truss reveals her favourite potato and tells us that Francis Drake and Walter Raleigh were the Liam Fox of their day (I paraphrase).

Theresa May's Brexit plan: No but yeah but

When Theresa May met Vicky Pollard ...

Mrs May, it’s been weeks now and we still haven’t seen your Brexit plan.

No but because what happened was was I was going round Liam’s but then this whole fing happened right because Amber Rudd who’s a bitch anyway has been completely going around saying that Justine stole some money out of Esther’s purse but I ain’t never not even some to Justine ‘cause she spat in Edwina’s hair.

Mrs May, when will we see the Brexit plan?

Yeah because but what happened was was this whole fing happened what I don’t even know anyfin about because Boris Johnson has been going around saying that David’s brother smells of mud but I ain’t so shab never even not even stole no car so shab.

Mrs May, have you even started this plan?

No but yeah but yeah but yeah no but yeah no but yeah but no because I’m not even going to Europe because Liam reckons they smell of garlic.

You know if we don’t get the plan by the end of this Parliament you do know it will be a disaster for the UK?

Yeah I know but David Davies emptied a whole bottle of Fanta into Merkel’s bag but anyway Boris reckons he fingered her in the Commons.

Mrs May, do you want the UK to prosper?

UK what? Don’t give me evos.

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